Weekly Weight In

I weighed in at 193.5 on Saturday morning.  I honestly have no idea whether or not I lost weight because it has been so long since I weighed myself seriously.  I do know that 6 weeks ago, before I fell off the health wagon, I weighed 189.5.  So obviously I gained some weight back during my weight loss journey haitus.  However, 4 pounds for a month of eating whatever the heck I want is NOT bad.  SO I feel pretty good about that.

I had a good week.  I did alot of things really well.  I logged nearly everything I ate on MyFitnessPal and I did get some exercise in - both walking around town with the kids AND actually getting on a tread mill at the YMCA.  There were things I didn't do so well, like eating whatever I wanted all weekend, but I think it was a good first week back.

So tomorrow is Monday and another chance to get a good start to my week.  I plan to get some exercise in by taking the kids on a nice long fall walk.  Now that I have a concrete goal (get back to under 190 lbs) I can start really focusing and getting it done.  Here we go!

My little buddy and I burning some calories together on a crisp fall afternoon.

Wodless Wednesday: Things that keep me active

 

The Power of Routine

 

One thing that always helps me stick to my diet is routine.  I know this is not the case for everyone, but for me, sticking to a routine for certain meals has many benefits.

I was recently reading an article in "Prevention Magazine" about Dr. Oz.  It was kind of a corny article, one of those "8 Things You Can Do To Increase Your Life By 10 Years" articles, but one small thing resonated with me.  Dr. Oz was talking about eliminating stress in our lives by not making too many decisions about small things.  And example he gave was eating breakfast.  "Just have the same darn thing for breakfast every day," he says.  "I automate as many decisions as possible, which helps me."  I have to say that I agree.

I pretty much DO have the same thing for breakfast every day.  I like to eat cold cereal with almond milk, and coffee with fancy creamer.  Its a routine for me, and that takes away a certain, small amount of stress in the morning.

I do a similar thing for lunch, although the routine of lunch changes every couple of weeks.  Right now I am on a "McDougal Vegan Instant Soup" kick.  One bowl of any variety of that delicious soup is 200 calories.  It is a surprisingly hearty meal and one that takes me time to eat.  So lately I look forward to having that for lunch, along with a piece of fruit or 2 and sometimes a sandwich or some chips.  Again, knowing what to expect at lunch time eliminates some decision making and a tiny amount of stress.  It also helps me better plan my day in terms of eating if I know roughly how many calories I will have when it comes to dinner time, and meal in which I do appreciate variety.

Routine may not be your cup of tea, but as Dr. Oz says, it can help us out a lot because it automates some decisions in the day.  This not only relieves a small amount of stress, but also prevents me from making a poor food decision.  There is a power in routine for me.  Is there for you?

Learning to think outside the moment

Its 9:45 at night.  The kids have been in bed for an hour.  The kitchen is relatively clean.  I am tired.  I know I should go to bed, but the kids are asleep and its my "free time."  I want to eat.  I know I shouldn't, so I try to put it out of my mind...

I pace around the house.  I turn on the TV.  I turn off the TV.  I fold a couple items of clothes.  I put them down.  I make some tea.  I walk over to the cupboard and open it.  Nothing in there.  I close it.  I open it again.  I start to get creative.  I think, "I could eat a peanut butter and honey sandwich on a hot dog roll."  I know its a lot of calories.  I sound desperate, even to myself.  I close the cupbaord.  I walk away.  My mouth waters as I think of the sandwich.  I open the cupbaord... and make a peanut butter and honey sandwich on a hot dog roll at 10:30 pm. 

As I eat the snack, I feel bad.  Deep down inside, I don't want to eat it, but I just can't get the thought out of my head.  I know I'll regret it tomorrow.  I know I'll wake up and say, "Ugh, why didn't I just stay strong and say no?"  I feel so bad that I go ahead and make and eat a second one. 

I was right.  I wake up in the morning and feel terrible.  I swear I won't do it again.  But I always do.  Sometimes it happens late at night, and sometimes it happens in the afternoon when the kids are down for naps. 

I was thinking about this scenario this afternoon and I realized something pretty big.  I need to learn to live outside of the moment.  I need to really and truly forgo my emotions in the moment and resist the food, knowing that I will feel so proud of myself later on.  It may be easy for some, but for me it is so hard. 

I will probably always have a desire to over eat.  I will probably always have an emotional response to food.  What I need to do is stop hoping that those feelings go away, and start to learn to live beyond those knee-jerk feelings and start forcing myself to see the big picture.  Its not easy, but it can be done. 

The Prodigal Fat Girl Returns...

Its been 5 weeks since my last blog post, and about 2 weeks since I last weighed myself.  The last time I was brave enough to step on the scale it looked like I had gained about 4 pounds.  I have stopped logging onto MyFitnessPal, and nearly stopped exercising.  So let's just go ahead and say what we're all thinking here - I fell off the wagon. 

So here comes the excuse... without going into too many lengthy details, suffice it to say that my life has been extremely stressful and emotional for the past month... OK, in a nutshell, we are in the process of selling our house and buying a new one.  Those of you who have been through this know that it is never as easy as you think it should be.  Those of you who have been through the process with babies and toddlers know that it can feel, at times, impossible.  In addition to that stress, a very dear family member recently declined in health dramatically, and sadly died about a week and a half later.  After traveling to PA to say goodbye, we came home to marching band season, so Nick was out of the house many evenings and Saturdays.  Like I said, its been an emotional and stressful past month. 

Not that I couldn't have continued to lose weight and improved my health during that time, I just basically chose not to.  For me, making healthy choices is a daily, sometimes hourly battle.  It takes an incredible amount of will power and creativity to stay on the wagon.  During the past month or so I just didn't have the emotional energy to make those choices.  SO I did not.  And I gained some weight back. 

But now its mid-October, and marching band season is over.  The sale of our house is well underway.  I am beginning to accept the loss in our family.  I'm ready to take a deep breath get back on the wagon.  

Tomorrow is Monday.  I LOVE Mondays.  Others may hate them, but I love them.  Mondays symbolize a fresh start, and give me a concrete and tangible time to hit the reset button.  So tomorrow I am going to do just that. 

This week I invite you to reunite with me on my journey toward a smaller, happier, and healthier Reb.  I promise to blog every day.  I promise to log what I eat online.  I promise to exercise, even if it is only once this week.  I promise to jump back on board, no matter how disappointed, embarrassed, or defeated I feel.  Its time to get off my butt and do this thing.  So here we go........